There are so many people I see from in person to social media who put up a front trying to be someone who they aren’t. This will not last long because you can only be a 1st class you and a 2nd class someone else. If you want true success and the success that will last long-term, you have to be an authentic you. That is the only way you will have the joy you need in order to last in our society.
Yes your fake self may be in the forefront right now but you know deep down it is killing you. You have to hate trying to be someone you are not just because the people around you think you need to be this way. Do not listen to them. They are only using you. They want to ride your success. Apparently they believe if you were authentic, no one would like you and is that really someone you want around you? I know I know.
As for me there are many people who love me and there are just as many people who hate me but that’s because what you see is truly what you get with me. I do not try and please anyone. The way I see it, as long as my wife, my son and God know where I am coming from and love me then that is all that matters. Anything behind that is gravy. I have many good friends that if I needed someone to talk to at 2 AM, I could call and there would not be a problem.
Unless you take a stand and quit being wishy washy, you will never experience the full Joy in life that God has for you. Even Christ to this day is loved by many and hated by just as many. If it’s good enough for Christ then I believe it is good enough for me and you.
I am not telling you to go out there and be abrasive even if that is your personality. There are ways to stay strong in your beliefs while still being respectful. There are two extremes to this idea here. One is being someone who you aren’t and the other is being so loud and obnoxious that you turn everyone around you off. There truly is a balance and when you find that balance you will be on your way to true success. You can tone some things down and still be authentic. There is a way to do that but you have to find that balance. You have to ask yourself what do you want more out of life.
A few years ago I was one who didn’t think before I spoke and yes that got me in a lot of trouble back then. Many times my wife would know where this conversation was going I was having with someone because she knew when she heard me and someone else starting to get into it we would be there for a while arguing. I am sure many times she thought oh no not again but she always loved me when she saw that happening out there. She knew God was working on me and that through him I would become better.
Well now I pick my battles. I see and hear things people say and I ask myself does this even matter in the scheme of things? I ask is this person willing to change his thoughts or am I? If the answer is “NO” to both then I know that debating there is probably a waste of time and I leave it alone. Yes I do still stand up for many things and I do still say things that I am thinking, I just try and have more tact when I do it now and also do it when I feel it needs to be done.
When it comes to advice I have learned to give it in a few ways. If I have a platform like speaking from a stage or this blog or on a video then I can give advice but keep in general so that when people hear or read it, the ones that God wants to touch through it, it will happen. Then when I am one on one, I only give advice to people personally WHEN they ask. Many times this is where people make the mistake.
People all of a sudden give advice to someone specific without them wanting it and that is where some problems arise. Sometimes you may have no choice when it is a life or death kind of situation like with alcohol or things like that but if it is not life or death then you need to zip it until they come to you and just love on them.
When people trust that you care about them and trust that you are not going to judge then they will start to come to you for the kind of advice that you have. So keep all that in your mind when it comes to advice. The best place is from some kind of platform that you may have. You will have more people listen to you from that than anything. The platform you have is what will give you the trust for people to follow you but always keep it authentic so that what people see is what people get!
Be Inspired or Be Left Behind!
Chris Benton